“Good afternoon, website sympaty.net. I have this problem – my man does not want to live with me, although we’ve been together a year. Meet, spend time together, but no development of the relationship no! I’m worried – what’s wrong?
Suddenly he has no plans for me or maybe he’s just afraid? Conversations on the topic, why doesn’t he want me to live, spend, say you want to move in together, but all he says early yet, not time yet. How to be? Probably have to part with it… sincerely, Irina.
Hello, Irina! In your problem you are not alone. Today, every seventh woman wonders why the beloved wants to live together, doubts the sincerity of feelings and the seriousness of the object of desire for hours scratching their heads over their “flaws”, supposedly preventing cohabitation.
Today we will try to understand why relationships are discouraged, and will give you a number of recommendations that will be presented to portions.
Separating the wheat from the chaff
It just so happened that we women know has just brilliantly “cheat” themselves, coming up with a thousand and one reason why he is in no hurry to “arrive”.
So you are not torturing yourself in vain doubts and worries you, get a notebook or Notepad, which will be designated as the personal diary or you can say, “diary of observations”.
In this notebook write, what points in the relationship and in the behavior of a loved one you have a concern.
By the way, thanks to the diary you will be much easier to understand how the seriousness of a man who does not want to live together, and the nuances of his behavior and his own desires. Rereading some points, you’ll soon notice that many of your worries are without Foundation.
A serious conversation as the way of salvation, the relations
Oddly enough, but most men are afraid of “seriousness” in relationships with women. Yes, Yes… they are afraid of a serious relationship, serious conversations, serious. And yet, in spite of the challenges “powerful” of this world, fears, sooner or later you will have to dot the “i”.
Replace the “worn-out” the phrase “We need to talk seriously”, “I need to consult you. When you can spare me fifteen to twenty minutes of your time?”. Forget about the claims and requirements.
During a call, just tell me about why you want to live with him, and ask him why he doesn’t want to live with you. Revealing the benefits of living together, explain that, while living separately, you personally can’t understand whether he is the man you will be fine, and whether he would be in the future comfortable with you.
In any case, don’t do showdown in a raised voice. Reproach and blame is also not necessary. Say, get involved in the conversation and loved, not afraid to hear an honest answer, ask yourself how serious and forward-thinking his intentions. If (even a few years), he plans to link you to your destiny, isn’t it easier now to figure out do you know each other or not?
Believe me, your man who doesn’t want to (or can not) live with you, to hear such thoughts much more pleasantthan to imagine you try to “tighten” it to the Palace of marriage. If we women could read men’s minds, you would see that they are not so much frightened by the prospect of living together as women’s dreams floating around the wedding outfit and the notorious stamp in the passport, that may arise from such cohabitation.
Think about it and decide whether you want to scare away the needless haste of the man you love?
Don’t want to live together or afraid?
Unfortunately, emotions and women “want” you can’t always see the true reasons why a man does not want in favor of your favorite live together. Have you ever thought that he might just be afraid of it? Let’s see what can scare your friend into cohabitation:
- Bitter experiences of previous marriage. If your man was married or intimately familiar with the “charms” of living together, no wonder he’s afraid to make another wrong. Try to let him know that you’re not like his ex, and instead teach him life would be a solid “support”. Talking about marriage yet do not start. Maybe it will affect something else. For example, you can pay attention to the compatibility of zodiac signs, you have everything in order, and in the case of a previous marriage the signs were incompatible.
- The desire to achieve financial independence. There is absolutely nothing strange or reprehensible in the fact that man wants to lead the woman, the mother of his future children, purchased and equipped for his money, the family “nest”. In this case, the main thing — to focus on beloved that you won’t be a burden, but, on the contrary, will strongly increase his wealth. Can confirm your words, as if by accident, to cite a few successful examples.
- Your man is happy with the uncertainty of your relationship, so he doesn’t want to move in together. If you see that a loved one is not committed to living together because in the “free from you” he was pleased the company of other women, spending time with friends to a higher priority to leisure time spent with you, or he likes the role of “loner”, as they say, everything is in your hands. If you are willing to put up with such defects, again, no – go. But ask him what he’s giving you not – their freedom.
Irina, think about the above, understand yourself and your feelings, talk to your man and draw your own conclusions why he doesn’t want to live together.
Don’t hide like an ostrich with its head in the sand, and let’s face it: if you see something really dear to him, and living together, he is not considered as a solution to the problem just because the material base is poor, then perhaps it makes sense to wait another year or two. You want to see near myself an accomplished and successful man?
And if it is simply convenient sometimes to spend time with you, without thinking about the seriousness of the relationship a certain period of time, it over you in the coming years is unlikely to hang the “threat” of a happy marriage, so take our advice and pay attention to other men!
Author Arina Prahova. Article created with the support of horoscopes http://astrorok.ru where women are horoscopes on the most diverse subjects.
A man does not want to live together: why and what to do in this situation?