Friends with benefits: is it worth it to get out of the friend zone?

There is such an ambiguous saying: “a man and a woman be friends can’t – they is always something rises”. “” offers to understand – can you make something like this to a friend was a sexual partner, but that friendship turned into an affair?

Ideal “friendly draw”

If you compare the relationship with a sports match, then sex in a friendly format good only when there is no “winner” and “loser”. No one is cheating false promises, no one suffering from illusory hopes, both understand the situation and get pleasure from it. A “draw”.

Perhaps, in an ideal it looks so: you’re both free men, both observed some discomfort due to the lack of intimate life, and you decide – why not! Tonight meet someone from your home, organize get-togethers with wine/brandy/beer, discuss the work/of your men/women/parents/children/politics (or what you have there oboyudointeresnym topics are available) and then doing a set of useful and pleasant exercise. In the morning we give each other a high five and run away with feelings of contentment and fullness in life.

Although, of course, you can come up with some other format. The main thing – no attachments, demands, promises, dreams!

And Yes – only on your conscience the question remains, whether friend of lover, with whom you initially connect open relationship for sex…

Friends with benefits: 1-0 in favor of women

Although, of course, to remain altruistic, with an unblemished conscience, engage in sexual relations of friendship, is very problematic. Consider a typical option when a woman becomes “the exploiter”, and her boyfriend is “used”.

So, all know the difference between the friend zone from the friendship? That’s right – one hopes for the relationship, and the other neatly holds it near himself is not giving much hope, but not quite banishing.

So many women genuinely call “friends with benefits” situation, when out of the friend zone is removed some lovelorn fan and put before the fact: “You, of course, I’m not a couple, but at the moment Prince is on the horizon there, and you’re temporarily good.” For sex and another for “emotional donation” (because any woman would not mind to receive a portion of undisguised adoration from some, not most unsold muzhchinki, even if in a serious relationship with him she doesn’t want).

Sometimes those blessed with “intimate friendship” gentlemen even begin to drive a friend to a cafe, to bring flowers and to give her other material pleasures – that is to do all about the same as they would do in “real” relationships.

The young lady graciously accepts all these “marks of friendly attention”, but it is not going to similar to give the answer: because she defended herself initially charged the man with the phrase “It’s only sex friendship, we will not be anything serious, let’s just be friends”. And of course, this is only his personal problems, he sleeps and sees itself not only friend but lover.

Why is it wrong for a guy not going to explain. Is there any reason for girls not to allow the option of having sex with a guy from the friend zone?

  • At least it’s not a very fair game. A man in love is very easy to plant on “sexual bait”, and it will be hard to continue this relationship.
  • And then he gets bored. Perhaps dramatically. Perhaps with scandal, accusations and complaints a common acquaintance…
  • Or he’ll get bored and tired woman. And she is already excited to finish this story, and the cavalier will whine about their miserable share, to put pressure on the pity, to sue in the style of “well why are you freaking out, well, okay well communicated”, etc.

Friends with benefits: 1-0 in favor of men

But, of course, not always boys so white and fluffy, and poor little lame duck. The phrase “friends with benefits” has rescued not one Lovelace. Still – it’s enough to say you sympathize with the young lady something like “Kitty, you’re sweet, but you don’t deserve me – you will definitely meet someday your Prince, and we have, if you want, can be friendly sex”.

And if the lady at least a little in love with and cherishes the hope that this “friendship” turn into something more that “friend” gets used, progreetsya, prioritse and still fall in love, then sex will be served to the man “on a silver platter”! And while he doesn’t have to answer the bouquets-restaurants (well this is friendship, what is courtship!), and for every timid question about some development of relationships with a wide gentlemanly smile to say “We’re just friends, what relationship?!”.

The website the Council — run like hell from such “friends”!

How to make friends bring you only pleasure?

Of course, nobody wants to be “loser of match”. Therefore, any disparity in the relationship of this kind need to carefully keep track of! Try to answer sincerely the following questions:

  • Would you like to have this friendship turned into an affair?
  • Maybe it would like your buddy?
  • You are greatly grieved if a friend has said he never wants to have sex with you?
  • You would be disappointed by the news that he found a girl?
  • Do you limit yourself in Dating and sexual relationships in order not to disturb these relations?

If you answered “Yes” to even one question – don’t be dishonest to myself: friendship here and does not smell, but clearly a situation where someone is dependent…

But there is a question that you need to only answer a confident “Yes!” otherwise, the friendly intimacy and all loses all meaning. Do you like sex with this man if your friend’s lover? After all, there is absolutely no sense to tolerate the inferior sex, and even without any romantic feelings!

Author – Dasha Blinova, site

Friends with benefits: is it worth it to get out of the friend zone? uses cookies to be better. Before you continue reading, you must agree terms and conditions

The cookie settings on this website are set to "allow cookies" to give you the best browsing experience possible. If you continue to use this website without changing your cookie settings or you click "Accept" below then you are consenting to this.