“Sometimes I feel incredibly tired from relations with her husband. We’ve only been together 4 years and everything is tired! We have often quarrel, but the quarrel does not help throw out the accumulated negative. Just coming devastation. I really love my husband, and he me, too. What a vicious circle. Julia”
With this problem faced by many couples. After several years of marriage it seems that the relationship has outlived its usefulness. There is no movement forward, everything became routine.
Why is this happening? And how to beat fatigue in the relationship? Today women’s site sympaty.net dealing with this problem.
Fatigue in relationships: 6 signs
If the opposite of those signs you put the plus sign, then fatigue in the relationship really accumulated. And this is something you need to do if you want to keep the family together. What are the signs?
- Relations do not give an emotional lift. You can easily predict what you will do today, tomorrow, the week and month ahead. The relationship feels dull and totally devoid of joyful emotions.
- You feel you made a mistake in choosing a partner. Over the years of living together broken rose-colored glasses and you suddenly had an Epiphany: he’s not your type.
- You have outgrown this relationship. And worse, you have outgrown your partner. You are smarter, more successful, younger and more interesting than he is. It is for you as a suitcase without a handle, drag is not desirable, but throw a pity.
- You spent the best years wasted with him. Was waiting for something big and bright, but it never happened. You are cruelly deceived in their expectations, and precious time lost.
- Constant quarrels and multi-day grievances with the game in “silence”. Even if was a painful heart-to-heart on Friday, Monday all over again.
- There is no strength and desire to fight for the relationship. Starts the rivalry and tug on the blanket itself. Nobody wants to apologize first, no one wants to concede.
I saw familiar items in the list? Sit probably regret now. But in vain! Early to put on the cross relations, especially if a large part of your life together was happy and rosy.
Family life and relationship is a hard everyday work. Any work we all do sooner or later get tired.
The main tool you need to repair your relationship – the desire to keep love and faith in your abilities! Even if your partner was weaker and dropped his hands – you must not give up!
What is the essence of fatigue from a relationship?
In one of our articles (Why women fall in love with) we already wrote about the “chemistry” of love. Implicit in our nature to gradually lose the feeling of love euphoria.
But the fatigue relationship is not a biochemical process in our body. This gradual reassessment of values.
Let’s say that the first partner we have offended. Or unpleasantly surprised. Or has not behaved as we would like. From day to day, such situations are accumulated in our minds.
And then we start to label it: “he’s out of my League”, “relationship hopeless”, “I deserve better”. Like a snowball that resentment begins to grow into new claims.
The fatigue relationship is a result of your unmet expectations.
How to overcome fatigue relations?
People tend to change throughout life. But it is unlikely your partner abruptly became stupid and ugly. If you think so, it is better to disperse – you don’t love him.
And if you are sure to love it, but just tired of these relations, all is not lost! To return to the old interest in each other really! Our advice:
1. Return all the things you did together. As you have now? Came home from work, had dinner, potrudilis laptop went to sleep-because-tomorrow-at-work.
And before that? Kissed in the face of passersby, chasing of balls in bowling, going to movies, dining out, walking in the Park holding hands! Remember everything you liked to do together and start again!
2. The more involvement, the better! And it is not only a joint entertainment, but also joint useful things around the house!
3. Don’t sit at home! A sofa, TV and laziness are the main enemies of family life. Get out of the house, not only together, but separately, to have something to discuss and something to share with a partner. Expand your circle of acquaintances.
4. Be spontaneous! To bring surprise in your relationship is not so difficult:
- give gifts for no reason and make compliments
- stop doing the “ritual” calls and texts at the same time
- think of your own holidays
- change your appearance
- rush excursion not only on weekends but also on weekdays
- sometimes do together what used to do separately
5. Sorry resentment. Love is when you don’t have to say “sorry”. Mentally forgive your partner for past wrongs and not go back to bad. Try not to criticize partner (or do it gently).
6. Sex. Sometimes I’m tempted to punish his sexual hunger! This can not be done in any case, because such pauses in sexual life can take months. The bed is not the place for the showdown! The variety and regularity of sex that is what you need!
7. Be interesting for the partner and for others! How to do it, you can read more here: How not to be boring for men?
8. Go together on vacation. But it should be done when you feel the thaw in relations and not risk quarrel on the fashionable resort for nothing!
But most importantly in the intensive care unit of relationships is patience and delicacy! Believe in your love, and she will sparkle with bright colors! ?
The author – Julia Caesar, the site www.sympaty.net – Beautiful and Successful
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How to beat fatigue in the relationship