“Look, I understand how scary/ sad/ hard.” This phrase should replace the sacramental “don’t cry.” Strict order is typically only causes a new wave of sobs or the whims of the kid more upset: you do not important his feelings. Expressing sympathy, you establish an emotional contact so you give to understand what you hear and ready to listen.
“Tell me why you’re crying.” This phrase is an alternative to the standard switching of attention. Attempt to distract the child a toy, active conversation or strained jokes – not always a good idea: such gross manipulation can aggravate a tantrum. Use a more gentle option – ask the kid to give you something that upset him. So he will have the opportunity to Express their emotions without crying.
“Want me to hug you?” Do not rush to kiss and fondle the child blubbered, trying to comfort him: this is not always effective. Besides, hugs can cause irritation or aggression, the child will break out and push you away. Instead, ask if they need your affection now: this will not only allow your child to maintain personal boundaries, but also give the opportunity to calm down yourself.
“Let’s figure out how to handle it”. By uttering this phrase, pause. Then start asking the right questions and not hurry the child with answers. Gradually he will be able to curb the emotions and start thinking on ways to overcome the problem. Remember: you don’t have to solve everything by yourself – let the kid to comprehend, analyze, and draw conclusions.
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