How to develop self-confidence and raise self-esteem

“Hello! I would like to see on your pages article on the topic of confidence. How to feel confidenthow to build self-confidence and not depend on financial status. I think for many women, this theme will be relevant.” Umka

Asked? Answer! ? Female site will tell you today how to develop confidence and raise self-esteem. But since this topic is vast and talking about it can be long, so we will cover only some of its aspects.

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Psychotherapist Linda Sherhart Sanford in his book “women and self esteem”, believes that many women judge him not on the merits, and disadvantages. For example, they know they are good mothers, communicative, nice women, good specialists in their work, but get hung up on the extra 10 pounds.

“So some women are given to understand that positive qualities are worth nothing, and they perceive themselves first and foremost as a woman with excess weight,” writes Linda Sherhart Sanford.

And what does it offer? Very interesting method of dealing with low self-esteem – creating a collage of their strengths and weaknesses.

To do this, take a sheet of paper and on it draw, write and display images in the image itself, using drawings, photographs and words. It is something like mapping the desires, only it is necessary to create a real, one where you are now. The most important thing for you to put in the center, and deficiencies on the periphery.

“This is a very good way to learn about yourself and gain self-confidence“, — says Sanford. This collage allows you to see who you really are. Thus the disadvantages such as extra weight or weakness, often lost in the background of such virtues as a sense of humor, great hair, slim waist, commitment and respect for others. Collage allows you to evaluate “big picture” and not to dwell on the faults.

In addition to creating the collage, Linda Sherhart Sanford also recommends in her book “women and self-esteem” to refer to others, friends and relatives, asking them to describe you. Often we listen to the opinions of others than to his own, so the characterization you made of the strangers mouth will give you confidence.

How to increase your self esteem?

Stop compare yourself with othersbecause there will always be people who are better at something or something more. With those who are better than you – take the example, but do not compare with each other.

A better compare…. the same! A year ago you was such and knew how this and that, and now you’ve changed and learned new things, became wiser and made some goals. Analyzing yourself, you’ll see clear progress (of course, with some work on yourself) and this will become more self-confident.

Tell yourself compliments and positive statements, like “I can do anything”, “I am confident”, “I’m attractive”, etc. Can hang this statement in front of the computer to put in your wallet or on the fridge. Self-hypnosis will change you for the better and will help to develop confidence.

Avoid those people who undermine your confidence. And often communicate with those who gives you confidence, inspires and supports.

Gain confidence in yourself you will help the thought that if someone did, so can you. No matter what to develop leadership skills, earn a car or to throw off 10 kg.

One of the main secrets of confidence – the correct posture. Note, all speakers and other successful, confident people have an erect posture.
Pay attention to the gestures of self confidence: open hands, a firm handshake, not crossed arms-free posture.
It is also impossible to appear assertive person, if you use word expressions “probably”, “maybe”, “seems”, “don’t know” , etc.

Helps to raise self-esteem, or to keep it at the proper level the use of the word “but”. You are not these stunning eyelashes, as a friend, but white teeth and a beautiful smile. You can’t buy a coat from Gucci, as your employee, but save money and after a couple of months go abroad to rest. The friend has a large chest, but her feet wheel. Only, of course, keep that opinion to myselfso not to offend anyone.

Not complex on the street in front of the counter surrounding. Believe me, people would not pay attention to what you are today without makeup or color your purse is not in harmony with the color of the Shoe. After a moment, you will be forgotten about as random passers-by, because people’s thoughts are busy with their chores.

Try to contact psychological center or to register for trainings of personal growth or improve self-assessment, for example. Helps to raise self-esteem group work is more effective than working on yourself alone. Be prepared for the fact that self-confidence will need some time and hard work: it is impossible to become another person for a couple of consultations.

How not to depend on financial status?

Many people think that if they have a car, an apartment, a prestigious job, position and Bank account, they not only in the eyes of others will look bigger, but also self-esteem will invariably go up. Unfortunately, in insecure people’s self-esteem rests on external attributes, so if a neighbor bought the car cooler, they immediately fall into despair and lose their former confidence.

Of course, the desire to live well is important. However, all the time trying to overtake someone, we transform their lives in a vicious circlethat brings happiness and satisfaction. Thus our self-image will never be stable, and to gain confidence in yourself will help only a new expensive thing.

Therefore, it is important to stop living “race” and the idea that “I am not enough”. Always come first and ahead of all to be impossible. Take it philosophically, apply method “but”… and start working on yourself! ?

Author Koronevsky Eugene, website —

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