How to find love: to be active or sit and wait?

How to find love? One girl in response to this question with certainty will be given and the strategy and tactics of the search, and tells many stories from his own biography to prove the correctness of his theory! And the other languid sigh: “Your love need not to look for, and wait for… a Real love – it and behind the stove will find…”. Which of them is right and how to find love – talk together on the website ““!

The tale of Sleeping Beauty, or Why the princes do not look behind the stove?

What a tale of childhood was your favorite? Most girls of a certain age is somehow crazy about all sorts of Cinderella, snow white, Sleeping beauty, quiet life which bursts into a handsome Prince on the horse, and provides an inexhaustible lifelong happiness.

But it would be nice if all these fairy-tale stories was there in my childhood.

Growing up, a girl should try on a certain female character, and, believe me, modest, quiet, humble parents, work hard from dawn to dusk, but it is stunningly beautiful without the slightest attempt to look after themselves character – not the character, which in reality would attract the attention of someone even remotely looks like a Prince!


Do you imagine real, contemporary and not related to the fairy tales Cinderella. She went to school and University on fat fives, and, most likely, goes to work.

Not too highly paid: because she firmly believes that her destiny from day to day to separate the peas from the buckwheat and get paid for their labors only reprimanded and not high income and credit! After work she runs gallop home, because the decent girls alone adventure and fun to look for should not! Even assumed the eyes of the passenger in the bus she considered shameful! And if someone plucks up courage and tries to get acquainted with this special, it strongly suppresses the attempts of rapprochement – she is expecting a Prince, but ordinary men, even nice and pleasant to talk to, don’t have any chance.

So, her life, and despite vague dreams of a magical meeting with the Prince there was in reality no place!

Several problems in order to find love, “sitting behind the stove”:

  • The Prince knows that there is a great N, which has agreed to meet with him. Because N does not happen anywhere else where potentially there are princes. And if it happens, it behaves haughtily and coldly, that any desire to learn disappears.
  • Beautiful N believes that beauty, given by nature, enough. Have to love the way she is, so attempts to change something about their appearance in order to please men, just immoral! But if princes prefer well-groomed, tastefully dressed in the fashion, do not shun the achievements of modern beauty industry “shepherdess”, you don’t have such princes!
  • Find love and get married are two different things! But not all girls understand that in order to get married, first you need to communicate with different men and to understand that the meaning of love is love itself, and not in the implementation of a certain “correct” life scenario. And to give up the opportunity to understand themselves and the men too stupid – not always the first man turns out to be the best!
  • “Kiln” beauty does not understand that a man has the right to choose, and he is not obliged to marry after the first date! And she wants from a serious relationship without the introductory phase, when the man still did not promise, but just eyeing and flirting. So she’s not trying to interest a man. Often, she interrupts barely originated the relationship with the cries of “this kid, we have twice in the cafe went, and he doesn’t want to meet my mom!!!”.
  • The lack of a realistic image of an imaginary person, about a relationship which she wants. That is, an imaginary male image from girls wishing to find their love “behind the stove” is, but it is idealized – there is not one flaw, not one individual dash – it’s a Prince! But in real life no such lady here, and drives away the unworthy knights, hoping for the appearance of Mr. Ideal!

What are the chances that the story of a modest homebody Cinderella will end with a meeting with the Prince and many years of happy life together? In fairy tales it always happens.

But in real life – very rarely.

But it so happens that Cinderella is annoying to wait for a miracle to disperse the suitors, and, in desperation, she marries a simple shepherd. And they will be happy or not – in General, it is the case…

To strive, to seek, to find and not to surrender!

Opposite of active strategy of searching their love, believed, it became permissible for women only in the last 100 years. Wanting to find love, the girl announces “the hunting season” — creates accounts on Dating sites, informs all her friends, asking him to introduce her to single friends, begins to walk in “blighted places” type cafes and clubs, and from accidental contacts and communication are not shrugs. Usually, this brings results it ask someone out, start a relationship of varying degrees of seriousness.

The advantages of the “strategy of active search”:

  • She begins to understand the psychology (and physiology) of men. “Simple shepherd” will not hang noodles on her ears, wanting to pass himself off as a Prince!
  • A clear understanding of what she wants from men. Since the range of income and ending culinary tastes.
  • Understanding what she wants from a relationship – a speedy marriage, a pleasant stay, peace of mind?
  • Will be something to remember in old age ?

However, in active search of his love you can find and cons:

  • Overly specific requirements for men. After dozens of meetings and countless correspondences on the Internet, it is difficult to look at the next candidate and the heart to feel that it is a pleasant and intelligent man. Because unwittingly starts “snapping under the options” — what cut of pants is like chewing out the shape of his nails, etc.
  • Boredom, the formality of Dating. One of my friends, seeking their love in such an active way, once said: “the feeling that I’m not Dating, and the interview”. Because instead of light of excitement and trepidation, appropriate for a first date: “will or will not work? He likes me or not?” comes the sure knowledge that if this fails, I will definitely be following (because tomorrow she will have another first date).

In General, in modern conditions is still appropriate to sit on the stove, and to look for love and not to interfere with the men to look for you! ?

However, to subordinate his whole life to the pursuit of love is also not necessary: men from the fire run away from the ladies who like written on my forehead: “I Want a serious relationship, here and now, take a married somebody!!!”.

To love has found you, you need to work on yourself – not just to be pretty and cook well, and be able to be friends with, interesting to talk to, to have your own worldview, Hobbies…

The website “” wants to find love to all the readers who still are in search of and waiting for!

Author – Dasha Blinova, site

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