The wife is not working: the pros and cons in the relationship with her husband

A century ago this would have caused deep bewilderment. What are the pros and cons?! The woman ought to deal exclusively with the home, and on self-earning woman that can make you think just a dire need! However, in our time the situation has changed, and families where the wife does not work (we are not talking about cases where the woman is unable to work for health reasons or sits with the baby), is a rarity! Good or bad for the relationship with her husband? Reading and discussing!

Dream to have a home and family, but how will this affect the relationship with her husband?

You want to try to stay home, and physical capabilities of your family allow it. However, whether or not – you will understand whether you husband?

Of course, I don’t know your husband personally, and to predict its response can! Meet men who can respond to the desire of his wife not work a categorical “no”.

However, if “no” is not definitive, and you realize that the husband may meet your suggestion? Then I advise you to try!

Certainly the husband sees that his wife has ceased to be tortured, tired and irritable, but at home he is met by a delicious dinner and passionate sex with a longing for the day wife! But if, besides, you will not lose a wide range of interests and no longer care for themselves – surely this will strengthen your marriage, and the spouse does not start to count the dead wife only “borshevskiy”!

Husband insists I didn’t work – agree?

I think it is not negotiable that your agreement or disagreement to quit my job should depend only on your desires, Outlook on life, life plans… If a man loves you, he will understand and accept whatever decision you make.

If you too wish to try yourself in the role of a housewife and your desires are the same – wonderful! And if not? Is it worth to give up your career and lead you unpleasant lifestyle “home-broody” just because the husband wants?

The website “” already wrote about the victims in the name of love. As a rule, they pay off handsomely only in romance novels and in life…

What will that accomplish? Husband will love you more? But perhaps to force her not to work, to live as not to her liking – a sign of great love?! Sooner or later will start the showdown with the theme “you ruined my career” and “you’re a terrible hostess” — and so to divorce the neighborhood!

Why some men want their wives did not work?

Some women with ten years or so begin to dream about the husband who will say cherished phrase: “Honey, I don’t want my wife working – do a home birth to her and more kids!”.

Other ladies, hearing such words certainly would consider it man domestic tyrant and a tyrant, depriving them of the right to a bright interesting life and want to tie to the hated pans

And what are the motives really can move a man who wants his wife wasn’t working?

The nobility of this or tyranny?

  • The ideal of the family – the husband-breadwinner wife-homemaker. Yes, there are still those rare instances of men who always dreamed of a stay-at-home wife that will greet them after a hard day with a bowl of soup and starched sheets! If the wife is the perfect family as well – this marriage probably will be very happy and harmonious! And if not, then it would be difficult to convince a husband that she does not believe the happiness of cooking the soup and nekrahmalistye sheets!
  • Assertion. Every man wants to feel big and strong – a true head of the family, “stone wall” for his wife. The aspiration is, in General, is correct! But some husbands want the wife does not work – in this situation the authority of the husband is much stronger! This is not a tyranny: husband thinks that makes a gift to his wife, freeing from the hated work, and the gifts are very strengthen the marital relationship. Most importantly, to the wife this gift is appreciated!
  • “The status need.” You ever heard that the wife of the President (of any country) went to work? Charity – Yes, social and cultural events, but not work! Even if you’re not the first lady, when your husband has reached a certain rung on the career ladder, he may want the wife does not work – status is not allowed. In his eyes is the same as to ride a tram or wear clothes from second-hand – shame-shame! You’re not going to quit your job? Convince husband that don’t do it for the piece of bread, and for the sake of interest. Well, a hobby! And Hobbies and quirks are allowed to the wives of even the most senior men.

And yet… Alas, there are indeed “messinki” (do not dare call them men) who force women not to work, so that on the background of “battered home aunt” look hero, “the breadwinner”! Such men invented the myth of “the housewife does not do anything”.

What to do if you encounter such an instance? Run headlong, because you’re not going to change behaviour.

Don’t want to run? Get a job and start living solely on their income – “a halo of a Martyr”, which is so proud of hubby, will noticeably fade!

Is it true that non-working woman will inevitably deteriorate as a person?

These often afraid of disabled women – “you’re devolving, behind the times, will become stupid broody, which is uninteresting and not understand anything except the pots and serials”…

But the inevitability of it? And what is the degradation actually? dare to recall that to work women started quite recently – this phenomenon only about a hundred years! And before that, thousands of years women were this supposedly mind-numbing, a way of life – the household, the education of many children…

So, to celebrate the victory over the tyranny of Patriarchy?

But you can decide otherwise – “home” the way of life is very natural for any woman, it’s in her nature! And if a woman sees life not career or money, but home, family, kids – it’s not degraded, but shows our deepest feminine nature, which is not and should not be men!

But if a business woman is not able to fully discuss with the housewife fluctuations of stock indices, it does not mean that one is wise and right, and the other is degraded. It’s just two different ways of life.

Besides non-working wife receives a unique opportunity for self-development, which the career woman may just do not have enough time – except for cooking and washing, can be engaged in creativity, to lead an active cultural life, to care for themselves, read books, play sports – but you never know what lessons you can fill in the vacated 9 hours a day! Is it the degradation?!

However, you will say, whence then come the ones aunt, who is self-development limited to the formula “simple human happiness” — “Borscht + Serials”? Is the female essence is so primitive?! No, of course.

And the reason for the degradation of these personalities – not in the home lifestyle, and in “mental laziness” Working, this aunt will not evolve but it will also discuss the borscht and TV shows, and the work is to be performed by it in so far as, that the administration did not swear…

If the wife does not work — it can be a gift for my husband. Real woman 100%! And can be slaughtered broody…

All depends on her!

Author – Dasha Blinova, site

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